Vanitas' Super Duper Triple Awesome Life
by PepperonciniPepperoni
Summary: A puppy is tragically kidnapped, but leads to so much more! But, will they ever get the puppy back?
1. Chapter 1

It was a monday &amp; was the best day ever at the beginning of the week bc it was Vanitas' birthday! wooo Vanitas had taken special procautions in inviting only his bestest friends and it was only like two ppl because he was super awesome and that awesome just poured off of him whenever he was around losers.

The group of three sat at a round table that was laced with super duper awesome pink lacey table cloth and each wore a party hat and had brought their papers with them. they were assigned homework to write something good about there popular budd.

Vanitas was soooo popular that birds stopped flying and fell just to see him, pebbles and rocks moved out of his way so he wouldn't hurt his girly toes and he even had a fanclub that worhshipped him. It was kinda hard work being so pops so he held six birthday parties a year, every 2 months and on a monday bc it was his fave day.

"Oh Vanitas I wash I was as pipuler as you can be are!" His pal Ventus was whiney and kinda ugly with blonde hair and a peanut collecting habbit that made anyone want to vomit. He had seven tattoos all over his body of peanuts doin different crap. like one was playing a banjo one was posing for a selfie and one was a vampire!

Vanitas wated to punch him but need his pop points to stay strong they are like vitamins, unless you are like linsey lohan hwo does drugs for them. "Ventus you will never be me bc I am you or something odd lol idk k ask Xenohort he freakin knows?"

Xehanort was snort laughter but not laughing right now "UH ya UH NO. Ventus stfu U are not Vanitas like wtf? He is my carrotion~" the plot was sealed

Suddenly like sudden Vanitias realliesed that his famouse puppy who he named directly after himself (VJ for short) was missing from it's throne. "VJ!JJ WJARE are you?!" He was running around like freakin WHoopy Gulburg until he notice somehting else! He had new neighbors his life was going to hell faster than a 2015 Ultima Evolution "omg no I do not want neighburrs!"

"But Vanni-poo don;t ya want more fame" VVentus Ventus

"Fuck no he dont bc this is papparzi shit right here" Xehanort was tha boss woot woot

Vanitas look out the widow again and there were three ducks playing with his puppy poodle VJ and it was scary bc they toss it a frisbee and it catch it in its mouth "NO I brush her treeth ever night omg this is the worse day ever and it's suppose to be monday so why the heck it fail like a tursday!

"Vanitas I thunk you should take the ioopportunity to beat them up and use the powars that a gaven you!" Xehosnort was the boss

Ventus was still at the stable reading Vanitas autobiaography he wrotten for the party. So they ignored him and Vanitas was like "U r frieaking right!" and stomped across his grass barefoot!

The three fucks stopped playing when he come over but werent scared, one of tham toss a rock at him and say "Get out of our grass old man!" lol funny ik

Little VJ tried to run back to his selfie taking buddy but one of the ducklings packed it up and Vanitas got all snip snappity and was like "Um who do yall think you are? but that was my precious buttercup Vanitas the great JR!"

"WE DONT CARE" the dumb red one yelled and vanitas felt like ventus which is kinda shitty.

Donald Duck come out side the housey house and was like "Um those are my ducks go away duhhh"

"They stole my duck!" Vanitas grred like a heartless and looked like one too (hes pretty not pretty looking but dont tell him that)

"OH YA?"

"Ya"

"OH YA?"

"Freakin yes you stupid footstool!" He was so mad his hair was black hahah.

"THen you won't mind winning her back in a game" Donald was smarties and knew how to get his favorate game a rollin. He was the biggest bestest fan of Supermarket sweep and used to be in track and runs like a rockstar he was so pro. "Put the poppy in the bathroom kids we got some works to do!"

Vanitas was scurred but too stinkin stupid to back out because his ego was the size of antartica and even tho he knew nothing bout the game he wasnt about to back out now. "I AM A WINNER

"not so fast Vanitas U have to win the game" XEhanort expelled "U need a partyner too and I'm too old and wrinkly lol and don't want to do it"

So Vanitas ran into the closest deepest darkest alley so he could find the first badass that came his way and funded one with red hair and black ugly teardrops under his eyes that were a sure sign of bad ass tattoo gana.

"Ooooook I'll do it for half your fame" The dude Vanitas was all noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo because he only thought ogf himself and was selfish just like with the x blade lol and when he wanted ventus to heart with him bc of it?

"OK Fine how about half ur house"

"Olay" Vanitas agrred and they introductoree to each otter and the redhead dude with the worst artwork body in history that wore a black costume was none other than Axeel but he did have some cool round thingys that he lit on fire kinda like a pyromaniac so Vanitas liked him anyway.

The two made their way to the local groacery store where the otters awauted them and there was three teams and the host who was beast. in team one there was the three little douchebag ducks who are btw hewey dewey and louianne. in team two there was vanitas and axel ofc and in team three there was Cloud and Speheroth

"Welcome to Family Supermarket feud~ " beast hummed happy with hair all over his body kinda looking like a bull mixed with a human mixed with a chipmunk horse or wtf ever he was a beast OK if you don't know what he looks like go watch beauty in the beast. "Today we gonnna start out with yall some mins for the big sweep" they all getted like 2 mins or something. YAY they shout.

"Now for some questties" He readded the first card and was like "What spread on butter?"

"BUTTER" Hewwy holla but he didnt hit his bell so he didnt get the points and they reminded him to his his bell.

"What's soapy!" He asked anoter one and Vanitas binged his bell and laughed at Hewey so hard it made his giblets hurt "Um can I have a answer plz?" Beast asehd

"soap shampoo and dissh liquiiid" Vanitas didnt hold back his laugh laugh and laugh more at the underaged possibly four years old duck that was in tears. The evil poured out of him like a fountain and Axel knew he was in love.

"What's sticky?" Beastie ask team three but they were so dumb they didnt get any answers write the whole game.

Soon it was time for the chosen ones to run around the market grabbing the most expensive shit hey could find and Vanitas was counting on Axel so he knew he has to has to find ever thing expensive. If he was gonna win Vanitas heart he be paying up the expenseses anyway lol

When the Beast thing said to start they all run out there but Jeweys team had the highest and went first but that didnt stopp Axel from grabbling all the meat he could and a freakin humungus can of soup so big that he had to brought the cart back to Vantias and grab anoter one and run out for more so he grab a bunch of maxipads which are for girls only and dish soap that was worth 670 dollars.

When thehey adding up the prices it was reveled to the evil little duck assholes that Axel had won the munnies for his Vani-poo and was dancing like shakira bc he was so happy that vanitas was happy lol

The fucklings walked out but the game was not up, Vanitas and Axel has a chance to win 5000 munnies by finding all the blues clues so they got distracted running round the store and got the munnies and danced some more they were so freakin happy

"omg marry me!" Axell squaked and they were engaged and Beast was like "hell ya bachelors party go"

"STOP" Vanitas saidy when he realied the ducks got away with his VJ darling "they...tehy...they took my DOG!" he weeped to tunee...

OH NO!

to be continued kthx


	2. Chapter 2

When Vanitas and Axel got home Xehanort rode up in his hoveround and greeted them at the door "WHare is lil VJ at my deer dear creator?" Xehanort was getting so old his alzehemrs were eating away his brain and half the time he coulnt remember if Vanitas created her or Xehanort created it?

:them stupid ducks liad to me! I am bout to call animal cops houstin! Iv'e seen them on tv and they save pooches lives!" Vanitas was in a uproar and Axel was being loyal by being by his side smoking a tenpack of cigaretts llike a bad ass

Xehanort dud a wheely "but vanitas remmeber what i said about violets are the answer?"

"Yes! violence is the answer! screw the law, Ive got this." so he went to his room to pack the necessities to taking those ducks out and tuning them into chicken mcnuggets. He packed some hi potions, gummies and his x-blade in his suitcase and lock it up.

Ventus hobbled out of bed bc theye have a twin bed bc they are kinda twins from the same body lol dont ask me ok? "Vani plz don't do it" he cried when he saw the x blade looking like it had 2 months ago when they fought ontop of a plate with their pictures water colored on it like a hippy tray.

Vanitas was caught and did not now waht to do do.

Meanwhale the fucks were out at dinner Donalld and his super hot gf Daisy were tooken the ducklys out to dinners for their triplet bbday. They sung happy birthday in unison making the other restuerant guest shrivel to peices at the pain of lisiening to the squaky voices of the worst voice portrayed charries in history.

There waitress Zexion was holdin his ears in pain but took their order anyway "What u be having?" He asked taking out a pink pen and the cutest little notepad in historic.

"Bebek Betutu!" Thay were all cannibals dressed like norm ducks but Zexion didnt give a fuck he just wanted a tip and wnet back to the kitchen. A hour later Donald realised his dinner was pretty late and got mad and go see why.

he was flabbergasted by was he seen, Zexion and his coworkers Ruku and Sora were really freakin high and hugging the food like treehuggers do in the woods and shark ppl do to sharks except the food wasnt biting back. "omg" he crieid but he go back to his table to wait anyway and there was Vanitas holding up the restaruant with a gun lol.

"OK give me VJ back gdi!" Vanitas was not playing anymore and he had bought Axel along but Axel was busy ordering his food at a table (but dont worry he will protect his girly if he has to)

Daisy and the triple ducks look scurred and Donald was bout to pee himself bc he was only able to use magic but liked to waste that in battle whenever he is selected as a charrietor to play as. He NEVER HEALS U

"I'lll shoot ham I Will!" Vanitas love his dog

Sora Zexion and Riku run out of the empliyees room and dopped Donalds food on the floor bc this was a shock scene. They were all three trippin so bad tho that it felt more like a reunion. Sora thought Vanitas was goofy and was all "oh shit reunion I rememaber when we were traveling round the stars trying to save the world..." Ya he was high bc U cant do that.

Riku hadnt had enuff drugs to be out of it yet tho he wished he had and was like "UM? He has a gun &amp; the sign outside says no guns duhhhhhhhhhh"

This shit was all so unreal that donald pucked up his food and was like "Lets just eat at home" but Vanitas slapped that box out of his hand like a bitch and was like BOY you aint gone no whare. the commotion was making the reastuarant pretty much the least popular fast food ever lol.

Axel still at his hot dog g

Suddenly the fight was gott more vicious and Daisy was like fuck this we're over and left but the triples sat and watched bc they never seen there dad so mean before. He even called Vanitas the N word!

"WTF" Zexion was yelling bc he was almost as pops as Vanitas but not nearly and this whole fight was takin his resturant fame away and that look his fame away and he was tossing body glitter all over himself to brung it back. "STOP JUST STOP" He holla and tossed his ducktionary at Donald to seperate the fight bc he did not want to hurt Vanitas purty face bc popula hoes stick togather.

"WHAT" Vanitas grrowlered

"idek whats going on" Sora gaggled so Riku told him to stfu too omg jeez what a wtf lol

"Yo guys have some serius issues jeez like get out of my shop omg" Zexion led all of them out the door even Axel and hung there pics on the door with restricted printed across them

Vanitas lost all the popular points he had and cried like a baby that lost it's binky ppl were so grossed out that they spat at him and talked poopy about him more than the did Justin Beeber.

But there fotunately was one peeples who saw all past all that (other than axel and xehanort and YOU ventus) and he come to the rescue and took a tank of gas and started tossing it on Zexions dumb ugly stupid shitty pt cruiser loser. the mysteriys person cackled like a witch in it's happy hour and watch it go boom.

Vanitas and Axel clapped like excited lil four year olds and cheered for their new comapnaioned. The took off there hoody and it was Luxorrrrd.

"holy shit he's got yugioh cards" Axel happy and so was Vanitas bc they like card game shows and Luxord was doing tricks with his cards.

"OK nice to meat U" Luzord give them both a card with his signature on them and smiled for the cameras ppl were taking pictures of him bc he was hot blonde and had muscles of a god. Vanitas almost felt like cheeting on Axel but dont worry he didnt.

"Who the fuck are ya!" Axel was jello bc of the eye candy.

"His name is Luxord he's fame duhhhh" Vanitas rollied his eyes

"Ya and I'm here to help yall defeat the fucks!" He announced and they were officially a team trio + Ventus + Xehanort lol

What will they do next~


	3. Chapter 3

The feud betwen the ducks and the main characters was still going strong &amp; freakin no one was getting along. Just the lil things in life made the issues bigger like Vanitas was outside in his pretty apron watering his pretty flowers when Hewey come over squaking like a fuck stomping all over his flowers "OMG will U Just fly south alrady?" Ventus had his bro's back like a tick would have a dogs ear.

"We're never goin no where" Louie yell

"Y" Vanitas shouted a vowel lol

And Dewey was like "BC we hate yyoooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuu!" The trio bounced back to there yard and Vanitas srsly thought bout becoming a freakin hunter but then remembered Bambi. he couldnt become a hunter bc he didnt hate all dicks and would have to kill his dear friend.

"omfg just give me the dog back and feud is overr" Vanitas attempted to bargain but the ducks were so smart they were white and says "NO"

"But maybe if you challege us one more time to a new game and let us win" Hewe said and Louis and Dewis were like mhmmmmmmmmmmm.

"Win? Win wat?" Ventus and Vanitas were like wtf bc who lets there enemy win.

"We got the money and you get the doggie" Louie said and they shook on it because Vanitas love his dog and is a true dog lover unlike those people in homeward bound that abandon there dogs and made them walk all those mountans with a kitty cat and that dog broke his leg or something at a train station. ummm why was that hole under the train?

Next thing they new they were signing away to get on the show and had to have four family members. Donald, Hewey, Louie and Drew had there shit down bc they are family and ducks lol But Vanitas Ventus and Xehanorties was a family of three...so they took terra.

When the game show started up it wasnt long before terra was grabbing the attention of the hole audience with his happy go lucky personality. He wa the star running around giiving highfives to kids and winkin at the girls and omfg did Vanitas ever fuckin hate it.

"WTF" Vanitas whinnied "I am soppose to be poppies and your bf is homerecking that" He grred at Ventus bc it was his idea to ring the dumb show off.

"shhssh my crate!" Xehandort saud "Ur fame will comem bac k and you will be super pops again we just have to win"

Suddenly Vanitas was like split in two like a melon. He didntk now if he showld rescue his puppy orr win for the rich and fame. He like to glitter like a star and paint his toenails pink and he couldnt do that wihen all these ppl lookin down on him. "OK mom" he said

"OK so we have Terra's family and Hewey's family here tonight and omg so exciting" Beast was the host again and look like he did when he go dance with Beauty with bows in his hair and really shiney teeth he was also kinda muscular.

Donald look pretty good too bc he'd let his mushtache grow out and actually look like a father but he was still wearing that gay wizard crud.

"YA I'm the best!" Terra was almost as loud as Sora and almost as annoying as Ventus and Vanitas was bout to knock his ass out.

"we gonna win" Deewey saaid annd Terra was soooooo rude bc he was like "Aw look how cute she is" and waved at the lil fuck like it was a tot sucking its binky.

"OK OK lets get this started Um ya so put your bee costumes on Vani and Donald bc your gonna be drawin words with your stinger and they have to guess hahhahahaha" Beast thought it was funny and so did his teapot and his lantern and his clock and his um wardrobe lol they were there in the audience.

Vanitas was trying so hard to freakin spell something out for his family but they were just not getting it. Xeharnot had alzehimers and kept forgotten what they were doin and Terra had the dumbest look on his vase. Ventus was the only one he could count on and that's saying something.

Here and there Ventus guessed right but his mind was so far into the gutter from living with Vani and Xehanort that he kept guessin bad words and Vanitas was getting mad so he kept stomping his feet and cussing more (Wat a bad influence right?)

Donald's team was doin so much better they got every word almost right.

Just as thaey thought they wood lose Ventus pulled out some go go juice and drunk it up and spun in circles he was then gushing the answers like a nerd. Vanitas had never been so proud.

"Wo omg whoa" Beast drunk from his teacup and was amazzed. "U gays won!" Ventus and Vanitas were bout to cheer but then Terra was taking all the credit and his fame was pouring out of him like a waterfall he was so amzing and ever one loved him.

"JFC" Vanitas tossed his x blade because he was so mad and was like "He can't even fit into a size 3 dress!" he whined and so a couple ppl realised Terra was fat and began poking him with pitchforks.

Hewey Dewey and DOnald were teh maddest little ducks in all of transverse town and glared at Vanitas with eyes full of red "You'll never see toto again, never! Unless you go to wizard of oz and then maybe you will see him." And they ran away and he could see his sad little poochies eyes as a tear fell from it's eye as they carried it away it looked over dewwys shoulder.

they jump in Donalds catalliac and dove off laughing.

A couple days later Vanitas eas experimenting relapse because he couldnt take being away from VJ, he felt like a evil waste. which he kind of was but dont tell him that.

"Ok dude U can not just lay round here dying" Luzord was there and so was Axel bc they are his bfff. "We need to go to that yellow brick road and save the doggie"

"OK...NO I hate tornatos I just want a new poodle" Vanitas was whack like he'd been popping heroin for ten ears and just now got off of it and was starting to look not so pretty and kinda ugly like a hobo. So Axel slapped him like a abusive bf and was like "U cant just aboandon our son like this"

it may look bad but axel is the real one sufferage here.

"Until you get our smoochie woochie back idk if we can be one together" Axel cried

"SO your breaking up with this?!" Vanitas really thought he was hot but he wasnt (play birth by sleep hes really ugly)

"no but we can't have sexy time" Axel was relly upset bout the dog and Luxord was failing awkwardly bc of the drama and it was settled...they needed a tornado and a witch so they could take the tomato to neverland...


	4. Chapter 4

A.N: Longest hiatus everrrrrrr! I'm sooo back 3

Vanitas Luxord, Axel, Ventus and Xenhaort had taken a cab to Imsonia to talk the soooooooo lame prince Noctis into approving there request of a tornedo so they could get to the yellow brock road.

Insomnia was awkwerdly named by the previus king in hopes that his son would stop sleeping so freakin much. Like fr he like walks around with his friends all the time and doesnt frickin sleep then all of a sudden will sleep for ten yr spans.

Vanitas thought the palace was ugly af but really wantned the help so put on his kiss ass shoes and trotted on in. He was so totally fab.

Noctis haad a really soft red cape on like the type that makes you want to pet it over and over again and a big crown on his head and was sitting in his throne looking big and bad but vanitas rolled his eyes and was all "excuuuuuuse me I'm important and i, ams here to request a favor that you will approve!"

"um ok let me just grab a paperwork " noctis sled and vanitas was super proud of himself because he still had it in him even after all these years of hiatus and the Trump inauguration which BTW yes he did attend bc he is super amazing. But then noctis termed round with the biggest rudest smile eber on her face. "just kidding suckerrrrrs. Cloud told me yall a batch of losers! Bahahahaaaa"

Vanitas could barely hear hi,self talking over the crooked laughter. But he asked his friends in desperation "who the whole is cloud who garrison" he even asked the readers. "who is cloud " he even asked the readers of the fanfiction.

Cloud was one of the super bitches that vanitas has super market swept with and currently he was listening to his sia cd while painting his nails pink. His poofy pomeranian was at his feet painting her own. "oh poochie i just can no wait until vanitas finds out i screwed her trip teehee heehee " he giggled like a rainbow queen almost because he was one.

That's why he carries his big sword around so he doesn't look as gay as he really is. And jsyk yes he did like aerith but she was really a guy and yes it was huge like 12 whole inches!

"ding dong shouted hewie" shouted louie and cloud knew she was about to get so,even big dollars because she has made sure that vanitas couldn't get the kings consent for the ducks.

But when she opened the door that was not what he asaw instead it was Ventus holding noctis hostage and cloud was like so confused that he painted his last mail green. "um mm where is louies the ugly ducking? .

"he's not herrr " noctis was still talking just like Donald duck and cloud was uber confused bc she was a blonde and all blondes can't even get a GED they are known as dumb blondes "did you eat a duck ! Without me?."

"ok ok stfu " vanitas was back to be the center of attention because he lives for that shit. The audience clapped and he knew he was getting a grammy. He had his xoxo blade out and was pointing it at everyone's necks but his owm. It was a very tense situation and axel knew now was not the time to get hard. "listen barbie bitch I just want my dog back n I can see you ar3 a log lover to. So get kingdom prissy here to sign my lease"

And by the power of pooch love noctis was signing some papers and all was in order. But they didn't have a house to side in when the tornado whipped the, away so noctis suggested his 2015 sunkeeper which was one fine boat. They crew all jumped on even clouds pufferoo pom.

And then the most awesum part was noctis used his diseased wife lunadreyas trident to summon a tornado and odd they flew!

Meanwhile axel was very frustrating. He has engaged himself to vanitas but they never did anything but go after this dumb dog so he was mopping on the deck in the vicious tomato winds.

Luxord was concerted bc they were from the same organixtion. He came out of the closet but has a rope tied round his ankle to stop from blewing away. "Alex I am warted about you" He lied to tell the truth but Axel was like "Leave ma alone I am horny!" and so he did but he diced to go talk to Vanitas bout it.

So he went to the kitchen and the living room and the dining room and the back porch room and then to the kitchen where he found not Vanitas but Ventus and Ncotis and they were talking mad shit yo and it was not cool ok. But Ventus he just not bright yall know what I'm saying so he didnt' even get what hte was saying but Luxord was still MAD so he was like "Listen I want to arm wrreslte you" And lol

He arm wrestle them both and won yay but then things got dark kind of like when you turn off the lights &amp; cant see bc then the lights wet out and they cant see

But thAN luckily lil Tinkerball flew in she was a short lil girl with a wand and had blonde hair the magical hat had put her in huffleduff bc she was very strange but she was a pretty good gal. They could see her flying around bc Cloud's sword was relly shiney and reflectored thangs ggood.

She landed on Vanitas shoulder bc he was the best damn thing in the room &amp; was like Hi am Tinkerdell.

"Oh my god purrrfect" Vanitas shed and almost purred like a kitty. "Listen Tinkerbell" He said holdin her in his hand "My dog Titi was stolen and we are trying to get VJ back and the three ugly ducklins took her to Netherlands. Can't you guide our sled tonite?"

Tinkerbell did sum sign luggage because she didnt know english and was a mmute but she did go outside and glowed a path for their delicious boat.

It was very imagical watching a miracle like this happen it was kinda like when Mooses used a staff to split the ocean in half so that ppl didn't have to built pyramids anymore. They sung there can be miracles the whole way and sounded just as god as Mirah Cary.

Neverland was nothing like Vanitas had expacted and felt deepy bad for his fancy pooch VJ. It was like totally not rad, the whole planet was just a frickin island and lots of water. The was mermaids and little homeless happy lookin kids runnin around but Vanitas kept a very stone hard face on his face the hwole time.

Xenahrt flew over in his hoveround "I hope they have motorised shoping cats here bc if they don't they are racisht!" He was very old and fond of complanding.

"Listen oldie two shoes this advenure is about me!" Vanitas was such a rich bitch with a fancy attitude that sometimes the author of this story even wished someone wood smack him hard for it.

And then bc they was about to land on the island thanks to the winds of the nado, Vanitas closed his eyes and prayed to his X-blade "Pls keep me safe and famous amos he prayed"

The X-blade shimmered like a banana when you peel it &amp; then was like "My durr boy I will always be with you in battle &amp; in ur heart but if you do not kept your fame then you will be a frickin loser just like Ventus" and then it stopped glowing and Vanitas was even more determened.


	5. Chapter 5

The lil group of Vansita, Ventus, Xehanot, Lizard, Alex and Noxtis and Cloud clammed off the boat and surfaced among the lil lost boys. Axel reconised some of them from missing child portraits on the back of milk jugs. Mysterirously they were dressed as animals

Vanitas overlooked them bc he was cocky af. "Can one of u danimal crackers show me where my smoothie pooch is?" He ashed and could see thru them they was hiidng something. "WAT IS it" He asked unpolitely bc he had no heart bc there was only one between him and Ventus and Ventus took it for herself.

The skunk was the most intellirgent child he was black n white and had a fat face "Sir our leader wood know where the dog is but he is on hiatus but don't worry it won't b as long as the author of our story was on hiatus but idk if he will be back before KH3 hits the netwarks bc Disney kepts postponing the release date." It stooled him.

The otters looked vary uncomfortable becauz it looked like the case was at a stand still. But Vanitas refuse to give up "Look lil skank, where did your leader go"

"Well…."

On the same island a lil bit walk away Peter Pan was hangin with lil miss Pocahontas but she was alot younger than she was in her movie that was by the same name. She was really tiny and had pig tails but still liked her some white boy. He was making a real douche out of himself by putting on a chief thing of feathers n trying to tickle her wit hthem. He'd forgotten about all the children he had kidnapped.

"Peter what about Captain Hook?" Pochahontas asked the tree that looked like Groot but was a girl, it moved its leaves magesticaly and sung to her

"Captain Hook will buy a book and he will learn to cook" It sung as Peter and Pocahhantas climbed thru it's braces very romantically.

There romance did not last long bc then Vanitas and crew find them they looked very disaponted and the children looked very homeless. But they did not look unwell bc there is alot of fish that you can eat out of the sea espaecially on islands. They looked kinda chunky tbh.

Peter fleew to the ground thanks to his magical cocaine that sprinkled round him. He smiled cute at them but no one liked him bc he is underage and they didnt want to go to jail. But he looked Irish so it was almost legal. "Hallo I am Peter Pen, welcome to the Netherlands would you like to cum to my hideout?" He tried to make them float to impress them,.

"No actually i wood like my fuckin dog." Vanitas cut straight to the point lol

"Well ya see there ish only one bad gay on this hurr planet. And her name is Captain Hook. I woould fight him myself but I am only ten years old" Peter Pan explanned lookin really innocent "And he want to kill me!" He sad

"Oh ok well let us halp you" Vantis shook on it and then he betray him by snipping some handguffs on his wrists his friends all cheered bc they were a gang. "Let's go turn this ginger into the ginger bread man" they all laughed and freed the little lost boys back to their families by using doors from monsters INC. (that is how Peter had been leavin his planet)

They were going go confront Captian Hook but they were all rally tired bc of the long trip in the boat the tornado was relly loud. So they set up camp &amp; helped Ignis level up his cocking skills.

In tha middle of the night Cloud was setting outside when Ventus diced to cum out and talk to her and he was bean very mysterious just like he usualy try to be in the game. He looked constipated but Ventus join him anyway "Hi I am Ventus and I want to have wild sex w/ you" he blurted and trust me if Vanitas had herd him he would have punch him right in the god damn balls for it but Vanitas was snuggled deep in his lucious soft big furry blanket made from the fur of the most expensive tiger in the world sleepin with his Axel boo.

"I cant" Cloud shed trying to sound so bad ass bc that's what kept his faggot fans around "I have STDS" He announce hahahahahaha I bet you Cloud fans are mad now hahhaaha

But then Ventus was like revealing just like the lingerie that he wore under his robe to impress the blonde man that looked like a straight up hooker babe. "Well so do I but if I have sex with U than neither of us will bc we will cancel out just lika in Algerbra bro" lol it's true there in cancelin out in Math but tbh between me &amp; U I woudnt try havin sex to cancel out STDs ok this is only a fanfic…

…..But the 2 of them did anyway.

The following mourning was a real mess bc yes they did go to Hooks ship but no they were not expectin what was gonna go on. But all yall KH fans know what's going on ok because Sora is the damn hero and he is always saaving ppl.

This true to the heart mf Sora was standing on the Black pearl w/ Goofy, Captain James hook &amp; none other than Chaptain Jack Sparrow they were arguing over who's ship it was and Donald wasnt' there bc he was babsy sitting his dicks.

Vanitas was mad af becuz for real this tan little shit trying to look like him but high a couple chapters back and Vanitas knew it bc he read the fanfic himself like 9 times. "Wtf are you doing here you keybladeing pushover" he he

Goofy was like laughing like he always does &amp; like almost everyone there wished he'd stfu excpt Sora bc he likes his amigos Sora was like "Um well you see We are here to just kidding jerk I'm not tellin your faggot face!" They laughed togather but it would have been like 5 times worse if Fonald was there so it wasn't that bad but then they drew their weapons to fight

Idk what will happen in the next chapter bc I haven written it yet but see you next time lol they are gonna fiiiiiight


	6. Chapter 6

The fight beganned very epicly but first they all stood lookin cool with their weapons. Sora had a big key that U would stick in a door and Cloud has a butter knife but its really big. Axel took out his fancy flame thangs and Goofy had a shield. But Vanitas had his super freaking awesome X blade and it glimmered like a ring you'd want to buy for your fiance bc he took such good care of it.

"Y aren't you fightining you pussy" Sora was really rude and yelled at Noctis

The thing is Noctis had been sleeping for a whole decade and had a beard on his face, he was using Hook's mirror to shave so that when he saw his fiance's corpse he would have a baby face.

Vanitas smackered Sora in the head wit hhis keyblade like he was trying to cut a loaf of bread &amp; was like "Quit stalling!" And they were all battles

Sora and Vanitas kept swwoshing and a swashing at one another with their blades while Goofy took on Axel &amp; Cloud no one really cared that hook &amp; peter &amp; Jack just kinda left because they aren't puppy snatchers and there hearts cracked thinking of this poor pooch being stoled by Donald

Goofy used warp strike to hang from a sail and kept freakin laughing it was so annoying that Cloud really honestly almost just left but Axel taped that sunnava bitchs mouth shut &amp; they punched him in the belly like they were boxing champions.

Vanitas was also winning when suddenly he herd "Chip &amp; Dale I chose you!" two little chipmanks zapped out onto the stage and Vanitas was so confuzzled that Sora was able to whack him with his keyblade lol kinda funny if you ask me.

"Oh snap he's got pokemon!" Axel was really scared so he pulled out a sea salt ice cream and ate it to boost it's stats just like in Naruto (when they eat Ramen before a battle)

The chipmunks knew some good moves but they had t be told what to do by their pokemon master and it was none other than Cloud's ex counselar Leon Squall Leonhart from Tranzerve Town. "Noooooo" Cloud was sad to be on oposite ends

"Listen you faggots quit being pussies" Vanitas had motivational words that put balls back on them &amp; they were like ok lol

Cloud drew out a ppokeman ball from his onesie that he wears (he was wearing the blue one that he wears in the game with a red ribbon around it ) and threw it at the ground and out came Weedle which was a digimon that looked like a row of balls strung into one with a unicorn horn on it's hair.

"Hahahah hee hee hee" Lagged Leon bc he had trained the blondie and his chipmucks chewed Weedle out fast and it had to be sent to the pokeball nursery but just as suddenly Luxord threw out a yu-gi-oh card "Blye Eyes Ultimate Dragoon!" He cried very epically and almost went super saiyan but don't worry he didn't but he was still blonde.

The blue eyes wasted no time in blowing a big beam at the tiny chip munks and the battle was decided Luxord was not only sexy as hell but he still had no heart and was a winner. Axel and Cloud apolauded him

Squall shook his fist and was vary angery. He knew that the only reason he had lost was bc of all of the gamers who purposely left him dead while playing his game. He diced to retreat but not before flippin off the trio with both hands "This wont be last time yall see me!"

"Wat a pussy" Axel exclamed

"He looks like a bitch with that dumb scar on his face what a fag" Cloud agred

Luxord was like "Um should we halp Vanitas" So they all turned to look except for Noctis bc he he didnt want to fall asleep on accidnet in the middle of a crisis besides he just shaved..

But Vanitas had her fight under control he had already taken out Goofy and Sora was lookin pretty gay. Well ok haha he always do but not this gay and ya they were at a stand steal. "Just surrender U mickey mouse freakin faggot" Vanitas was mad af but what else is new

"Make me you twat" Disnay censored out Sora's cuss word bc he was supose to be the hero. So they all laughed at the little shit. Sora then did one of his hero stunts and tried to use warp strike on Vani-poo but he slice and diced his foot off lmfao. Don't worry he'll grow it back bc this is a video game for young ones.

The group held hands and jumped up and down cheering bc they had one their first battle. Xenahorto clapped to but then felld down the ship steps that lead up to wear they sale the boat. The old man had ben trying to be a captain before he had a heart attack &amp; died of old age how sad. But now Vanitas had no choice but to put him in a nursery home bc he couldnt take care of him atm bc he was on a misson.

Vanitas &amp; theyre crew got into a gummy ship and went to Transverse town bc it was the most normal place to be and besides it was already in Squall's gps. When they got there they wheeled Xenasnort to Radiant garden right away and there was a girl with brown hair in a pink dress but she was gardening "Don't step on my flowers grr" She was very pretty btw

"I am here to…." Vanitas beganned

But Xehanot was like "Her's here to throw me in a freakin nursey home!" but then he saw how hot she was and was like "But I am clearly happy about it" he boned

"Oic" She said and stood up and wwatered her flowers "Ok Hi I am Aeriss" she winked at Luxord bc he is very hot and he was like let me show you my yu gi oh cards. Wink wink

And then omfg Terra walked out wearing his awful dress pants that Sqyuare Enix thought was a good idea to put on him and he still had a really cocky attitude and it made Vanitas Luxord and Axel gag but Ventus was soooooooooooo happy and stupid as always

"Wtf are you doing here " Vanitas asked the Terra "We took ur fame points go be homeless"

But then there was a flash back and it helps explain alot they all watched…. Terra began out all poor and shit and he was living in a box next to the closest Walmert. He begged for change alot and looked relly dirty and growed a beard.

on e day Hewie lewie Deweie and Chewie were coming to Walmart and recorgnised him and they hated Vantias so freakin mucch that they gave him the munnies to start a orphanage for old ppl to get his fames back

So he then was able to be Terra 2.8 until KH3 coms out and then he'll be fancier

Vanitas frakn hated the story and hated the enursing home "Fuckin forget it u bastard I'll take care of this old bitch" Xesasnort cried bc Aeris was hot af.

"This is war you ugly black haired mutt lover" Aeries was evil too tho thhat makes her kinda unnattravtive idk? But anyways they went back tothe gummy machine and hopped in to make there way to the next spot that them ducks could b….U'll find out where soon tho bc I don''t even kno….tbh…


End file.
